Have you ever ‘googled’ yourself? With a name like mine, you don’t have to do much filtering to find out what the internet knows about you. Just type in your name and read the results.

A few weeks ago, I took this a bit further and searched for myself on Apple Music. I obviously didn’t have anything better to do! I was shocked to see that it actually returned a result. I was officially an Apple Music artist. Cue Excitement!

It didn’t last long though. I noticed there was one recording listed next to my name. Then I saw what it was. Oh no, not that one! It was a CD we did while I was at University. One I’d honestly rather forget.

I remember being persuaded to be part of the project. It was a world premiere performance and recording. The composer was supposed to be amazing and it was this exciting jazz fusion modern piece. Then the music arrived, and it didn’t make sense.

As one of the soloists, I had to meet up with the composer to practice with him. He’d written a bit of my part, but most of it he wanted me to make up. ‘Don’t just play notes,’ he told me, ‘get inside the piano, hit it, do anything.’ Totally out of my comfort zone.

As the search had spewed it out, I decided to have a listen. Had it improved with age? The answer is no! It still sounded like the chaos I remembered. (Health warning: I don’t advise you go away and have a listen)

The last year feels a lot like that piece of music. We have all had to live way outside of our comfort zones. The goal posts just keep moving. We settle into a pattern and then the rules change. Everything feels chaotic and random.

How are you coping with that? How are you finding it? I know I’ve said it before in these articles, yet I want to say again. I’m so thankful that the Bible tells me that God is unchanging. No matter what I face each day, I can know that God is as loving as he has always been, he is as faithful as he always be and I can totally rely on him.

Praying you all keep safe and well.